And then I gave up too

When the pain of holding on

Is greater than that of letting go

Maybe it's time

To let go

There was a void where I was. It was dark, but I knew it wasn't night, because my night left long back. And the day wasn't here too. I was all alone. I stood alone today. The wind blew. It was the wind of memories, striking me hard. It was the scenery of love. Deprived love. I think I missed the stars. 

It was hard, harder than watching the night and the day let go was actually admitting you're all alone in this vast expanse of species. Harder than watching you go, was holding on. Harder than anything right now, was the pain of feeling I'll let go. Because I knew I was alone, since I felt empty in the arms of my night. 

I didn't feel the water on my feet at the harbour today. I didn't feel the sunlight giving me energy. I felt the need of letting go. I felt the need of love. I felt the need of nearness of my night. I felt the need of you. 

The sky projected memories of happy days and glimpses of sad eyes. It projected the broken and faked smiles. It told me stories which formed my body. It sprinkled on me, the stardust which I once owned. But now, I'm not anyone. I'm just a girl, walking on a road to nowhere and I'm not star because I have no stardust. Stars don't even exist anymore. 

I think the hardest thing about letting go of someone is that you don't want to. But you have to. Because life makes you. I've dwelt upon these broken memories of mine, and they tell me it's time to let go. 

Everything was so hard that I couldn't come up to anything today. Reality was too hard to be faced because the oceans were empty and the skies were black. The light was dissolved, the stars were no more. The pathways were empty, the cars were jammed, the staircases were dusty. The locations were still there, but the memories were cloaked beneath the dust of the staircases, and the seats of the car and the tiles of the pathways. 

So I let the ocean take me along. It was almost not painful. It was just breathing hard and then letting go. It was quicker than falling asleep. And the best thing about it was,  there was no coming back. No waking up. And I didn't want to come back. I wanted to lay here, within the waves of the oceans and the burnt stars. I didn't want to come back because there was no night. 

And I let the waves wash away

All the pain of yesterday